Skript 170303: While sitting at Bonington Gallery foyer, Nottingham
(UK)
2 columns of
sensation either side of my spine, if they could speak in words i imagine them
saying to other parts of me, get up, move, dance me…dance with me, move with
me, i tire of this position, stillness in this position i hold for you…but if
only…. moving into the blue red image.. the dust falling on to my face. running
into the depths of the blue, red cloth, image.
i feel another
part of me moving elsewhere , if a mind could dance into new places it would
happily move into the depths of bleu and red…moving into and out of, with and
beyond…not worried to be constrained by time and space, mind dancing, body
dancing, all the same but only physics really holds me here…i long to
escape…into dancing parts and whole, particles and molecules … our 100 billon trillion
cells all doing the same dance. or
different dances, and also our two billion year old self also dancing with the
self present, or thinking she is present, now…
crawling. i sense
the pressure into the knee the shift
across the pelvis the tightening of the stomach muscles as the other knee moves
forward… this is my two billion year old self knowing. memeboring. rememboring.
boring… re member….boring….bearing….
bearing the weight.
laughter. ha ha. what…
head falls
forward, releasing the upper back the shoulders. if i crawl will i need this
kind of release, if i crawl or dont sit will the needs of stretch and pull
shift and alter
falling to the
image.. the particles drifting .. me as particle drifting. in and out. do i
have the same lightness.. do i fall on many surfaces? i sense a longing long in lightness. my body as a piece of
dust, part of the air around me. what would it be to touch you as the air touches
us? the dis-appearing self that so compels me.
a lightness in my
arms, back and chest, i sense my dust-ness, feel into my dust-ness as i float
in the air, and then there is something more, notice it, wait to find the
words, the tickle and heavy quality of of of of…the keyboard, i hear him say.
the room shifts. i
relocate, fight to stay the sounds. i work as work to press the sounds into the
muttering background while noting the ways in which the inner fluttering
increasing as the room dynamic changes. so loud.
the group stand to
the left of me… forming a space that circles in on themselves. hello.. he says.
join me.
the passing feet
pause and the choreography of the room changes again. do you sense it see it hear it? as you sit
with me we might imaging the dancers, people as dancers.. passing around us
centre stage? can you write the dance?
the sounds behind are our music…. ok ok … i sense the potential a drop a
fall. great.
the hand on the
lip a light touch. a pause. his dance your dance our dance all in the one
gesture. a chinese gesture perhaps?
an awkwardness
about being centre stage. wondering what’s behind. what sounds to respond to,
what movement might be happening behind my head. wondering what movement is
happening with your head. its tilt as a dance? your lips slightly shifting the
smallest moment movement are the thing. there is no need for more. ok. so mine
is the choreography of uncomfort. the touching of my lips, the scratch of my
head, the shift of my body on the chair. shifting as dancing. twitches.
gesture. the patterning and repeats that shapes emerge ,,, the hand returns as
your dance of gestures and twitches takes shape here now at the keyboard with
me. and these gestures are the same i have when watching work i realise. the
feeling of both performer and observer, by turns comfortable and uncomfortable
depending on who’s watching and who’s being watched. we’re in this together,
and this needs both of us. ah yes. i recognise that being with self whilst watching
that which is presented or just is in front around me. being with my body my
sense while noting how that shifts me with that i watch.
small feet catch
the corner of my eye….
More
people now. more sounds, more sense of being observed. and more to observe.
with our backs to the action. and our observing is from our backs the eye in the
spine…. the eye in the back of the neck.
.JPG)
